Maybe a bird… Wait a minute! Supposing two swallows carried it away together?
Have you checked for any holes in your wall? Maybe you coughed or sneezed while sleeping.
Or if there are multiple holes in the walls shine a laser though the holes to get the butt plug trajectory.
If there are multiple holes in the wall, find the one that was made for your buttplug.
I dunno how exhausted or drunk you’d have to be to pass out with one of those things inserted. Seems like it’d feel like a turd half out and your body would prefer you deal with that and not fall asleep.
Spoken like somebody who’s never used a butt plug
Yeah, that’s why I said “seems like” and not “when I do it (this) happens”.
You do you.
You should also do you… with a butt plug.
Lol, I appreciate the sentiment.
Nah good ones are pretty comfy and after a while if you don’t cause it to shift you forget it’s there
Why are you even wearing one atp if you forget it’s there 🤣
Because being suddenly reminded that it’s there is the point.
It’s the unexpected sensations that are the most powerful.
Because when you do shift around slightly…
It’s another carbon monoxide poisoning poisoning
It’s a riddle. It was made of ice.
Imagine the frostbite
You mean a freezejob, aka rimfreeze
Or chocolate
… some stay dry, others feel the pain.
I move away from the mic to breathe in
😂🍫🌧️
I like how he clarifies that he lives alone.
“Sure, one of my roommates could have come in and poked around in my butthole while I was sleeping. But no one was in a position to do such a thing.”
Hey I had a roommate that would steal my inserted butt plugs while I was sleeping.
And then what?
Subscribe to my only fans to find out more.
Occam’s razor and all that
Occam’s buttplug
It’s always in there
Anon will need a plumber because he got up in a daze to use the bathroom.
Anon needs to go to a hospital soon
Better get an MRI to look for it
Ouch… We don’t want to kill that anon!
but sadly, Anon is American
The worst condition of them all.
No shit.
Literally.
for OOP, yes
Object Oriented Programmers never poop? Interesting.
exactly. neither do Online Only People. interestingly, Poop&Online Only People (POOP), even though they are very similar to OOP, do, in fact, poop.
Buttplug fairy takes the buttplug and leaves you with a shart.
Know your local mythology.
Shart Fariy 🧚💩
The more timid subspecies of the feared diarrhea-jet-superpropulsion fairy.
Some say a mere glance of this fairy can have you leave orbit!
Can we ask that Diarrhea Jet Fairy to visit certain ones?
Weaponisation of fecal fairies can lead to aftermaths of unprecedented destruction on all sides leaving the whole plane of existence a shitty mess.
But, in the interest of exactness, yes, you can def do that, just ask directly. Usually the convo would go something like “Hey, can you pay a special visit to that guy?” - “Why?” - “Why not?” - “Good point, I’m on it!”
Must have been the wind
Maybe just a homeless guy
Do people actually do this?
I do yea
People aren’t buying all those butt plugs for decoration. People fall asleep. I don’t imagine many people sleep with them on purpose, but certaintly possible to pass out with a butt plug in place.
Sorry, I thought the implication was that someone intentionally slept with one in. I don’t know how you’d sleep like that.
falling asleep is the easy part, the hard part is waking up with a sore asshole knowing you need to make it worse to make it better
That’s why hard plugs are for short periods of fun times, and soft plugs are for all day / all night usage.
Speaking from experience.
Don’t do this too often though! Prolonged dilation (>2 hours) can damage your sphincter and give you incontinence in the long run. Probably not a problem if done rarely, but if it happens regularly it can become a problem
I mean, your hole shouldn’t be sore in the morning unless you’re sizing up with a new plug. Especially not with a stereotypical conical thin necked black silicone one. I’ve slept with plugs with a neck diameter of like 1.25" before
Maybe? This came from 4Chan so it’s very possible it could be entirely made up lol
“The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood. Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.”
Literally on 4chan as a header.
also, a statement by Fox News lawyers. (though maybe they used the word “entertainment” instead.)
Made up aaaaand?
Attracted to the same gender
4chan makes me believe it more in this case
Anything on 4chan I assume isn’t real, but pretend it is. More fun that way.
I’ve done it before
Username checks out…
Women amirite
And gay men. Or maybe that’s a 90s thing.
I allow some gay men to bear the rank of trash girlfriend
And you’ll do it again?
It’s not out of the realm of possibility
Hyuk
May I ask why? No disrespect intended, just trying to understand.
Was horny, it’s hot
That’s the thing. I’d be horny all night and wouldn’t be able to sleep.
Hard not to fall asleep at 4am after that 10 hour goon sesh.
Mostly joking.
Mentally ill people perhaps
You sleep with poop inside of you every night, hoping your muscles will save you, we are just being responsible.
Prude
Gatekeeper
Well yeah, that’s literally the point of the plug.
Did it have a flared end?
If yes:
It’s in the toilet, he sleep walked and took a shit and doesn’t remember.
or
He pooped it out while sleeping and his dog ate it.
If no:
Butt plug goblins.
They can be warded away with a metamucil potion.
Way worse than your dog eating your homework
Mmmm, that’s some fresh greentext too!
So fresh it’s still green
Yeah it doesn’t have the remnants of being compressed to .jpg over 1000 times over. Just doesn’t have the same feeling with it though.
Oh wow. I’ve never seen one this fresh!
Funny, that’s the same thing a stray cat said when it found that butt plug.
Ambiguous. Could be September 3rd.
And from the future apparently
True, I didn’t notice the year. :)
It’s under the bed.
i rate this greentext fake on scale of 1 to gay
